RETITLE: Getting Ahead Of Yourself by John Thornton Draft 2
Draft Two Comments... have YOUR say!
One (distinctly average) Date Later... by John Thornton Draft 1
Draft One Producers Development Notes for the author
1. We suggest you change the title of the film as it doesn’t sum up about the script is about. As the filmmakers come to the site and begin looking at the scripts, the first thing that will
attract them is the title
2. Again thinking about the filmmaking process - can we change the location of being on a bus to a bus shelter? This would be easier for a filmmaker to source.
3. We felt the ending of the Mind running off down the street may not work - How can you make the ending stronger? What if her mind turned up? What if her subconscious had been sitting there all the time, just out of shot? Think about how you can play a bit more with the interaction between the mind and the man - can the woman hear any of the conversation? Only one side?
Have your say, what do you think?